I have been married to my husband for over eight years now; I love him with all my heart and things are going well most of the time. But our love life has been sort of slow and dull at times; it feels like a routine doing the same things over and over.
We have talked about how to spice things up between us, but it still comes down to the same in the end. Sort of like falling back to the same routine, having sex once every two weeks or longer.
For several months, whenever I would go out, I found myself looking at other men and getting excited at the prospect of being with someone else and found myself fantasizing about them. Imagine for yourself what would it be like to meet someone new and feel all the emotions you have at the start of a relationship. Feeling the butterflies in your stomach at the excitement of meeting someone new and interesting. The thrill and fear of getting naked with someone new and the thoughts of being penetrated by a different man than the one you routinely have sex with.
All of these thoughts would get me really excited and horny and I personally started feeling like I wanted to try it one day. I had an enormous desire and want to go out on a date with someone new and explore these feelings once again. But I did not want to leave my husband; I love him even though I wanted to experience someone new with another man. And there I found myself thinking about how I can have both things, a safe and protective relationship with my husband and a way to prevent anything from damaging our love. At the same time, I wanted to achieve my goal, to go out and date another man, have sex, and experience new feelings and emotions with someone else.
I started out playing with my husband, sort of planting a seed by telling him made-up sex stories and fantasies of men watching their wives having sex with other men. He gradually was getting aroused when I would tell him fantasies about me going out and getting a guy in a bar to kiss him and have sex with another guy. I could start feeling him become erect with more and more of these fantasies I told him about and it became something we did when we had sex to get us turned on.
One time I suggested that it would be interesting if I got a boyfriend and film us having sex so when I got home, he could watch us fucking together. He got really horny and gave me a good fuck that night. From there on, he started sharing similar fantasies and was getting excited about the prospect of me getting into bed with someone else. I think this was the turning point for me and him and I actually thought I might be getting my way to having a relationship with another man with the consent of my husband.
Several more months went by and we were having sex with these fantasies; it really got us turned on and excited. One day I told my husband to take some sexy photos of me because I wanted to open an online dating profile to see what type of men would reply to my ad. I was a bit nervous when I asked him to take the photos; my voice cracked up a bit. And to my relief, he agreed to help me take photos and said it was okay for me to open a dating profile.
A couple of weeks went by and I started chatting with a nice man in his 40s, a few years older than me. Just like I prefer, older, mature men who know how to please a woman. We found ourselves talking a lot more each day, sending messages on a daily routine. My husband knew I was chatting with him daily and respected my space. Never once asked to see my phone, although he did ask how things were going and if I was enjoying talking to another man. I always told him the truth, that I truly enjoyed it, and shared the fantasies I was having with this other guy. He was married also, but separated, with no real relationship with his wife.
Then the opportunity came up for us to have our first date, a dinner date. It has been years since I got dressed up to go out on a date; I felt so nervous. I told my husband and he said it was okay, just have a dinner date and we will see what goes on from there. See if there is any jealousy that can come up and cause us to fight or feel uncomfortable. And we agreed that we would call it quits instantly if someone felt uncomfortable.
